New Year's Peeved

New Year's usually gives me a mild panic attack every year. To be fair, I am prone to panic attacks but there's just so much pressure that comes with the new year that this kind is especially potent.

Everyone is always demanding to know what your New Year's Resolutions are, what your plans are for the night of, and what your plans are for the year to come blah blah blah.

People who know me know that my life is stitched together with silly string and therefore they should know not to ask stupid questions like that of me, unfortunately these people are few. When I am asked this question, I just say what everyone else says:

1. Be healthier (mentally and physically)
2. Be more optimistic
3. Be more open to change

Pretty good, right? But those will never happen. Mostly because that is not who I am as a person.

Number 1 I can do for about a month before one of the two drops off and it all goes to shit.

someecards

 

Number 2 just isn't part of my personality. I have been cynical almost my entire life and that isn't going to change anytime soon. Sorry, folks.

Number 3... bahahhaaha, there is nothing that terrifies me more than change. And that's not changing anytime soon.

Sure, I can try and work on these things, but it is unrealistic of me to try to completely change myself. I might be able to tackle one, for a month.

Here are my REAL New Year's Resolutions:

1. Find full-time job (no more contractual work)
2. Hang out with people that make me happy, not people who make me miserable
3. Consider graduate school

These are three attainable goals. These, I might just be able to do. Why pick goals you know you aren't going to achieve? Why lie to yourself? You are just going to feel like a failure later when you don't accomplish them. Keep it simple and attainable.

New Year's Eve party plans? Just thinking about the planning that is involved makes me want to bang my head against a tree.

This year was quite a different experience for me, in that I didn't completely hate myself afterwards. I did something I wanted to do, with people I wanted to be with. There was no pressure to get trashed, to dress up like an ass, or to do something everyone else would be envious of. It was a simple party and bar kinda night.

partycity.com

People tend to make New Year's Eve a mandatory MUST of some sort: MUST have fun, MUST get drunk, MUST get laid, MUST kiss the love of my life, MUST MUST MUST...no thank you.

I am going to stick with my own approach of New Year's Eve.

Me...

As for the question of this coming year's plans...there is nothing to say. How the hell am I supposed to even think about that? I am adding a number 4 to my REAL New Year's Resolutions:

4. Live day to day and relax about the future.

What are your New Year's Resolutions? I want your real, honest ones, not the answer you give your parents friends when they ask.